Pokemon: A New Path
by Greg The Arcanine
Summary: A series that I direct personal! And no kiddies! Their innocent minds couldn't handle the dirtyness!
1. A New Face

"A New Path"  
Act I: A New Face  
By Greg The Arcanine  
  
Greg: Welcome to my first lemon, so here is the Disclaimer:  
You can't be under 18 to read this lemon; if you do then I am not responsible if your brain gets warped. If you want to post my Lemon somewhere, make a MST out it, just E-mail me so I know. This means you too Shadow, I know where you live! (Pushes a button on the intercom) you do have shadow's address right Chrissie?  
Chrissie: I did, but now I lost it.  
Greg: What? What am I paying you for?  
Chrissie: you don't pay me anything.  
Greg: Oh, oh well, on with the story!  
  
Location: A Forest  
  
It was another day for Ash, Brock and Misty. Misty (of course) was bitchin about something to Ash, while Brock was studying the map. They have been lost in a forest for 3 days and we're run low on supplies.   
  
Misty: (In a tired voice) Let's sit down and rest for a minute.  
  
They all agreed and sat down.  
  
Ash: Let's eat while we're resting.  
Brock: Sorry, we're out of food.  
Ash: (stomach growls) Man I'm hungry.  
Misty: (angry voice) Well if we would have stuck to the map and not taken one of you stupid shortcuts, we wouldn't be in this mess!!!  
Voice: Shhhhh!!!!  
  
Ash, Brock and Misty shoot up on their feet very quickly.  
  
Ash: What the hell was that?  
Voice: (whispering voice) Shut up!!  
  
All three of them turn their heads from where the voice was coming from and saw a guy standing there, the guy about 7'2" 220lbs, blues eyes, brown hair, Black Jeans and a Black T-shirt and nothing but muscles.   
  
Ash: (whispering) Who is that?  
Brock: (whispering) I don't know. (looks at the guy) Who are you?  
  
The guy never answered, they noticed that he was interested in something beyond those trees. They wanted to know what he was looking at so stepped up behind a couple of trees and looked around them and saw a small opening. In that small opening they saw two guys in a white uniform with a red "R" symbol on the front of their uniform and gun holder on their right side.  
  
Ash: (thinking) Team Rocket!  
  
He moves in for a closer look and steps on a stick.  
  
*Snap*  
  
The two Team Rocket members jerked their heads toward the sound, saw Ash, and drew their guns at him.   
  
(Note: from here on the 2 Team Rocket guys will be know as Team Rocket Guy #1 & #2 and the guy in black will be know as Guy in Black.)  
  
Team Rocket Guy #1: Freeze!!!!!  
Guy in Black: (looks at Ash) Good going Dumbass!!!  
  
Team Rocket Guy #2 signaled Ash out to the opening then saw Brock, Misty and Guy in Black and signaled them out too. (They both had magnums by way) Then he reckoned the Guy in Black.  
  
Team Rocket Guy #2: (smirks) So we meet again.  
Guy in Black: Too bad there won't be another time.  
Team Rocket Guy #2: You're right!  
  
And with that he shoots his gun at the Guy in Black, but the Guy in Black swiftly raised his right hand and caught the bullet.  
Team Rocket Guy #2: What the hell!!  
Ash/Brock/Misty: (wide eyes) Whoa!!  
Guy in Black: Is this yours? (He holds up the bullet that Team Rocket Guy #2 just shot at him) (smirks) here, you can have it back.  
  
In one quick movement the Guy in Black flicks the bullet in Team Rocket Guy #2's head and thought the other end, Team Rocket guy #1 looked at the dead body then up at the Guy in Black.  
  
Team Rocket Guy #1: Who are you?  
Guy in Black: Your worst nightmare!  
  
And with that, Team Rocket Guy #1, ran like hell!   
  
Ash quickly reacted.  
  
Ash: Pikachu Thundershock!!!!  
Pikachu: PPPPIIIIIKKAACCHHUUUU!!!!!  
  
Shocks the crap out of Team Rocket Guy #1 making him fall unconscious.  
  
Guy in Black: You fucking retards!!!  
All: WHAT??  
Guy in Black: I have been trying to find Team Rocket's Main headquarters for mouths, but now I can't find their hideout, I wanted him to runaway you morons!!  
Ash: Oops...  
Brock: Sorry, but we have been lost for three days in the forest, decided to rest, ran in to you, TWO GUYS TRIED TO KILL US!!!! (cools down) We thought they we're muggers or some kind of thief.  
Guy in Black: What's done is done we have to move on. (looks at all three of them) What are your names?  
Brock: Brock!  
Misty: (in a sexy voice) I'm Misty handsome.  
Guy in Black: O...kay, (points at ash) and who are you?  
Ash: I'm Ash and I'm going to be a pokemon master. (digs in his pocket) I already have four badges.  
Guy in Black: (looks at the badges) So you're on your way to Saffron City?  
  
They all nod.  
  
Guy in Black: Follow me.  
  
The three of them followed the Guy in Black till they came to an opening with was a dirt road path.  
  
Brock: Where are we?  
Guy in Black: On a path to Saffron City. (pointing west) Saffron City is that way.  
Misty: You never told us your name.  
Guy in Black: Just call me 'Killer'.  
Misty: (thinking) He's so sexy. I have to have sex with him.  
Killer: I guest it's on to Saffron City, you three have to come too.  
Brock: Why?  
Killer: Cause you just got yourselves involved too.  
Ash: Involved in what?  
Killer: Being down Team Rocket, now they'll try to kill you too.  
Ash: Shit!  
Brock: How do you know?  
Killer: They find out one why or another, has anyone been following you?  
Misty: Jessie and James.  
Killer: Who?  
James: Nice of you to mention us.  
Ash: Not again!!  
  
Jesse/James Theme Music starts  
  
Jessie: To protect the world from devastation!  
James: To unite peoples within our nation!  
Jessie: To denounce the evils of truth and love!   
James: To extend our reach the stars above!  
Jessie: Jessie!  
James: James!  
Jessie: Team Rocket, Blast off at the speed of light!  
James: Surrender now, or prepare to fight!  
Meowth: Meowth, that's right!  
  
Killer gives them a strange look.  
  
Killer: What the fuck was that?  
Jessie/James/Meowth: Huh?  
Killer: Are you some Team Rocket rejects or what?  
James: How rude!  
Jessie: (walks up to Killer and starts rubbing his upper arm) Hey handsome, I'm Jessie.  
Killer: (jerks his arm away) I now who you are, you said it in that stupid speech.  
James: It is not a stupid speech!  
Killer: Could you three leave now?  
James: Not without his Pikachu (Pointing at Ash's pokemon)  
Killer: How about I give you this instead?  
  
Killer raises his right hand in front of their faces and releases a bunch of energy waves from his hand causing them fly off.  
  
Jessie/James: It looks like Team Rocket is blasting off again.  
Killer: here are your choices. Come with me and help me bring down Team Rocket or go on your own, the path you chose will be all up to you.  
  
Ash: what should we do?  
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------  
Greg: Aaaaand cut, that's a wrap now get the hell out!  
  
Everyone leaves expect Chrissie and me.  
  
Greg: Take 5 Chrissie.  
  
She gets out for under the desk with white stuff covering her face.  
  
Greg: Here come the teases:  
  
What will happen next time on?  
  
Pokemon: A New Path  
  
Ash and company decide to take up his offer  
  
Misty tries to hit on Killer (poor guy)  
  
Killer gets to meet a rare pokemon.  
  
This and much mor- (moans)  
  
Greg: It's been 5 minutes?  
Chrissie: yes  
Greg: All right continue.  
  
This and much more on  
  
Pokemon: A New Path  
Want to be a guest, or just send feedback, E-mail me at MCV_Driver@yahoo.com   
  
(c) Arcanine Productions Inc.  



	2. A New Beginning

"A New Path"  
Act II: A New Beginning   
By Greg The Arcanine  
  
  
Greg: Disclaimer time.  
  
No one under 18 sure be reading this, if you do I am not responsible for anything ALL RIGHT!!!???  
  
Everyone is sitting around the set (movie set kind of thing, I know it's a lemon, but it's my lemon and I'll however I DAMN WELL PLEASE!!) discussing stuff.  
  
I walk in.  
  
Greg: All right, the four of you wanted to know when you get pay?  
  
They all nod.  
  
Greg: Well, judging by the contract that you all so blindly signed...  
Killer: Contract?  
Greg: Yes! I had you all sign a contact before I began writing the series….  
Brock: Damnit!!  
Greg: What?  
Brock: I was too busy watching Chrissie masturbate in the other room, I wasn't paying attention to what I was signing!  
Ash: Same here  
Killer: Me too  
Misty: Me three  
  
(everyone looks at Misty)  
  
Misty: What?  
Greg: Anyways, you don't get paid and your not allowed quitting the lemon series or I will send you to the 12th dimension where everything sucks!  
Killer: You don't have balls to send us there!!  
Greg: Really?  
  
I reached in my pocket and black remote with a single red button on top of it, I pointed it at Killer and pressed the button. The remote started to make a humming noise followed by a multi colored beam. The beam hit Killer and disappeared in a white flash.  
  
Ash: What the fuck!?!!?  
Greg: Anyone else care to test my limits?  
All: No!  
Greg: (grins) That's what I thought.  
  
I pointed the remote towards the place where Killer was standing earlier and pressed the button again. Same thing happened only Killer reappeared.  
  
Greg: What have we learned here today?  
Killer: I GOING TO FUCKING KILL YOU!!! (he starts to charge me but then I pointed the remote at him and he stopped) (growls) Don't fuck with the man!!  
Greg: Good answer. (puts the remote back in his pocket) But you guys are entitled to choose your own personal slut, but you can only chose a half-human half-pokemon slut.  
Ash: When?  
Greg: After this episode, by the way, where's Chrissie?  
Brock: She said she'd be waiting for you in your office.  
Greg: Ok then  
  
I turn around and started to walk to my office.  
  
Lemon Writing Office  
  
I walk in.  
  
Greg: Welcome to my office, as you can guess, this is where I write my lemons.  
  
I walk over to my desk, kneeled down to look under my desk, then I saw Chrissie waiting for me under there. By the way, if your wondering whom Chrissie is, She is a half-human half-pokemon Vulpix.  
  
Greg: (Quiet voice) It worked.  
Chrissie: What worked?  
Greg: (Quiet voice) The plan!  
Chrissie: What plan?  
Greg: (giving her a dumb look) (Quiet voice) The plan to distract Ash, Brock, Misty and Killer to signing the contract without reading it.  
Chrissie: What was the distraction?  
Killer: (normal voice) It was you! (I point at her)  
Chrissie: Me? What did I do?  
Killer: (yelling) FORGET IT!!!! (normal voice) Let's start the lemon already. (I pull up a chair to the desk)   
  
  
When last left our gang, Ash, Brock and Misty were lost in a forest thanks to Ash. Then they meet a guy named Killer, who was chasing 2 Team Rocket guys. Ash screwed up Killer's plan to find Team Rocket's HQ. Knowing that Team Rocket would be pissed at Ash and his friends for rendering one of the Team Rocket guys' unconscious, Killer knew that they would send out Assassins to try to kill the three of them. So Killer asked them to join him in his journey. Let's watch shall we?  
  
Location: On a path to Saffron City  
  
Ash: We'll do it!  
Killer: Wise choice, (looks at his watch) better get moving, I want to get to Saffron City before dark.  
Brock: We need to buy supplies anyways.  
Killer: Let's go then.  
  
The four of them started to walk towards Saffron City.  
  
(Scene change)  
  
Location: In a dark room  
  
Two figures and a Meowth stand there with their heads bowed. In front of them was a desk and a tall head chair. Another figure was in the chair; the back of the chair was facing the other three figures.  
  
Figure in Chair: So, you two failed me again. Care to explain before I kill you?  
  
The three of them raise their heads.  
  
Standing Figure #1: Well you see, it wasn't our fault this time.  
Figure in Chair: (turns his chair around slowly to where he was facing them) Really? (looks at standing figure #2) What's your excuse James?  
  
James: Jessie's right, we ran into a guy who was pretty powerful.  
Figure in Chair: How powerful?  
Jessie: Powerful enough to wipe the three of us out in one blow.  
Figure in Chair: Did you catch his name?  
All: No!  
Figure in Chair: What did he look like?  
Jessie: Tall, big ass muscles, Brown hair, A gun holder on his left side and a knife holder on his upper left shoulder which was upside down (It's easier to draw the knife like that, duh!) and wore nothing but black.  
Figure in Chair: Killer!  
All: Who?  
Figure in Chair: Let's just say he's an odd friend of mine, anyways, were the three kids that you were chasing with him?  
All: Yes!  
Figure in Chair: In that case, we have to kill them too.  
Meowth: Meowth, Why?  
Figure in Chair: (yelling) DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST DO IT!  
All: (jump back scared) Yes, Sir!  
Figure in Chair: (normal voice) Good! Now you will need some help in trying to kill Killer. (he pushes a button and a figure walks in) Meet Killer's Bother, "Ninja".  
Ninja: Reporting for duty sir!  
  
Jessie, James and Meowth stare at Ninja for a while and then they notice something strange about him.  
  
James: (to Figure in Chair) He looks exactly like Killer.  
Ninja: yes, we're twins, excepted I'm better than he will ever be.  
Figure in Chair: Take the day off, rest up, cause in the morning, all four of you we'll be on a mission. To kill Killer and the three brats! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! (he puts his hand on the joystick (which at the end of arm, of the chair, on the right side) and beings to move the chair. But instead, it begins to jerking and spinning around) All I asked for was a frickin' rotating chair.  
James: Great! Here we go again.  
Figure in an out of control Chair: I'm starting to just a little frighten. (the chair starts jerk and move around faster) (loud voice) I need an old priest and a young priest!  
Ninja: I'm getting out of here before he starts ranting the chair.  
Jessie: Good idea  
  
All four of them leave.  
  
Figure in an out of control Chair: (yelling) The power of Christ compels you! The power of Christ compels! (then the spins around really fast almost making him fall out of his chair)(normal voice) Whoa! (then stops) O...kay! (bends over to where he's facing the floor) Sick as a dog, (spits on the floor) going to vomit.  
  
(Scene Change)  
  
Location: The checkpoint building before you enter Saffron City  
  
Ash, Misty, Brock and Killer enter the building.  
  
In the building was some stairs that went up to the next room, a door on the other side of the building and a counter. Behind the counter was a guard sitting in a chair reading the newspaper with his resting up on the counter while listening to "Californacation" by The Red Hot Chill Peppers on the radio. The guard didn't even notice them walking in. They were about to leave out the door that leads to Saffron City when Killer stops. Words start to form in the back of his mind.  
  
So you finally made it , meet me on the 2nd floor.   
  
Killer: (thinking) I'm on my way. (looks at Ash, Brock and Misty who were all giving him a strange look) Go on ahead to Saffron City.  
Ash: Ok, we will meet you at the gym.  
  
Ash, Brock and Misty leave, Killer walks over to the stairs and walks up to the 2nd floor and walks thought the door. In the room was a big ass window and two binoculars were on a stand looking out the window. A floating figure was looking in one of the binoculars. Words start to form in Killer mind again.  
  
Welcome Killer, are they gone?   
Killer: Yes, (Reaches for a black box this is hanging from his back pocket, he pushes a button and a green light comes on, then he puts a ear piece in his ear.) and the translator's on.  
Floating Figure: Good, now come and look what I'm looking at.  
  
Killer walks over the pair of binoculars that the Floating Figure was looking in. Killer looks in the binocular and sees the top of the Saffron Building and then he noticed a light was on. The Floating Figure landed on Killer's shoulder. (Before you get any ideas, The Floating Figure is about 1'4" and weights about 9.0 lb, so it's pretty small.  
  
Floating Figure: What do you notice about that building?  
Killer: It's Big.  
Floating Figure: Besides that.  
Killer: Someone forgot to turn off the light.  
Floating Figure: It's not a light, it's what you've been looking for.  
Killer: Excellent, after I collect it, all I will need is two more.  
Floating Figure: Better get moving then.  
Killer: Right, Later.  
Floating Figure: Good Luck, (Killer leaves out the door and Floating Figure watches him walk towards Saffron City.) you'll need it.  
  
  
Who is the Floating Figure?  
What is Killer collecting?  
Who is the Figure in Chair?  
What is Chrissie doing under my desk?  
  
Chrissie: Sucking your dick, remember?  
Greg: These are rhetorical questions!!  
Chrissie: Oh... Sorry.  
  
Will Ninja, Jessie, James and Meowth defeat Killer, Ash, Brock and Misty?  
Is Ricky Martin gay?  
Have you meet The Muffin Man?  
  
Find out in the next episode of:  
  
Pokemon: A New Path  
Act III: A New Enemy  
Want to be a guest, or just send feedback, E-mail me at MCV_Driver@yahoo.com  
  
(c) Arcanine Productions Inc.  



	3. A New Enemy

"A New Path"  
Act III: A New Enemy  
By Greg The Arcanine  
  
  
Greg: Disclaimer time.  
  
If you under 18 you shouldn't be reading this lemon, so close down this web page. Go on, I dare you. (Starts making chicken noises, then everything goes black)  
  
Chrissie walks in.  
  
Chrissie: Did you just call everyone chicken?  
Greg: No! I swear on this Bible!  
Chrissie: That's not a Bible! That's a book of carpet samples!  
Greg: mmmmmmmmmmmm.... Fuzzy  
  
Location: A Bus Stop  
  
I was sitting there next to three half-human half-pokemon girls waiting for the bus, which was running late.  
  
Greg: (angry voice) Goddamn bus! Where the fuck is it!!??  
Girl #1: Why don't we walk?  
Greg: (angry voice) It's on the other side of town!!!  
Girl #2: Why not take a taxi?  
Greg: (angry voice) It's too damn expensive and the cabbies are non-English speaking people.  
Girl #3: Let's fuck till the bus gets here.  
Greg: Good idea!  
  
Girl #3 unzips my pants.... (Wait! I don't wear pants! Life is good when you are a pokemon, well, half a pokemon.) And starts to suck on me, then gets on top me and we start fucking, and Girl #1 & 2 start to licking each other.  
  
(Scene change)  
  
Location: The Lemon Writing Building, The Set  
  
Ash: Where is he?  
Misty: Did he forget that we moved?  
Killer: I'm going to get a bj from Chrissie. (Leaves)  
Brock: I'll go look for Greg. (Leaves)  
Ash: (looks at Misty) Want to fuck?  
Misty: Ok! (Walks over to Ash, unzips his pants then pulls them off. She didn't have to suck his dick because it was already hard. So she just got on top of him and they started fucking.)   
  
(Scene change)  
  
Location: A bus stop, 11/2 hour later  
  
The three girls were lying on the bench sleeping and I was pacing back and fourth on the sidewalk. Then Brock walks up and sees me.  
  
Brock: Greg!  
  
I look up and see Brock.  
  
Greg: Brock! What the hell are you doing here?  
Brock: Looking for you.  
Greg: How did you get here?  
Brock: I walk. Remember? You got a bigger and better studio.  
Greg: Let me look at my planner (I pull the planner out of my briefcase and open it) Lets see, (starts flipping through the pages) Fuck Chrissie, Fuck Chrissie, Receive the 3 personal sluts from Sluts R' Us then fuck them with Chrissie, Aha! Hear we are, Write Lemon at new Studio across the street from the bus stop then Fuck Chrissie. (Looks up at Brock who just noticed the three girls.) All right, Let's go.  
  
Brock: (looking at one of the girls Tits) sure.... (I round kick'em in the jaw) *SMACK* WO! WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT FOR!!???  
Greg: Cause you weren't paying attention and I felt like it. Now get your ass in gear and let's go to the studio. (I go over and wake up the three girls and walked to the studio.)  
  
Location: The New Lemon Writing Building  
  
Brock, the three girls and I walk in. Killer, Misty and Ash are back in their chairs talking.  
  
Greg: Well, I finally got your orders in.  
Ash: What orders?  
Killer: (looks at ash) The sluts you dipshit!  
Greg: (shouting) START THE MUSIC!!!  
  
The date music starts up and I appear with a microphone in my hand.  
  
Greg: (looks at the card) This young Eevee is very frisky and loves to fuck, well, everywhere! Let's bring out... RRRRRREEEEEEBECCA!!!!  
  
Rebecca walks out.  
  
Greg: Next, we have a Flareon that loves to play it rough; she even likes to tease her sex-partner! Let's bring out.... ADRIIIIIIIIAAAANA!!!  
  
Adriana walks out.  
  
Greg: Finally, we have a sweet and loving Vaporeon that prefers passionate sex more than anything *coughcoughcornycoughcough*. Let's bring out... MEEEEEEEIIIIIILIE!!  
  
Meilie walks out.  
  
Greg: (the music stopped and I threw the microphone aside) Let's get the lemon started already!  
  
I walk off.  
  
Location: Lemon Writing Office  
  
Greg: Let's get started  
  
  
In our last story, Ash and company decided to join Killer in his quest to being down Team Rocket. And later in the story we learned that Killer had a twin brother named Ninja. And Killer meet up with A Floating Figure and the Floating Figure told Killer that the light on the Saffron Building was not a light, but was thing that he was looking for. Let's watch, shall we?  
  
Location: Saffron City, (finally!) by the gym.  
  
Ash, Brock and Misty are waiting outside the gym then notice Killer walking up.  
  
Misty: Where the fuck have you been?  
Killer: Doing business, let's get this over with.  
Ash: Badge #5 here I come.  
Killer: Don't get cocky; rule #1 never underestimate your opponent.  
Ash: I don't see you with any badges.  
Killer: (grins) Ok, Let's see how good you are, in the gym.  
  
They all walk in.  
  
Location: Inside Sabrina's Gym  
  
Ash, Brock and Misty are standing looking at a big sliding door that was across the gym. Killer was looking around.  
  
Killer: (thinking) I sense an evil presence in here.  
Ash: (loud voice) Come out Sabrina, so I can defeat you!  
  
The door starts to open slowly. Then Sabrina walks out with a doll.   
Doll: So you come to play some more?  
Ash: I will defeat you this time.  
Killer: (looks at the doll) (thinking) It has to be that doll.  
Doll: Ok, but if you lose, you have to play with me forever.  
Ash: Haunter! Go! (throws the pokeball on the ground releasing Haunter).  
Haunter: Haunter!  
Sabrina: Kadabra! Go! (throws the pokeball on the ground releasing Kadabra).  
Kadabra: Kadabra!  
  
Battle Mode Activated  
  
  
Greg: This is Battle Mode. What is Battle Mode you ask? When Battle Mode is activated as you see above that is when two or more people or pokemon are about to fight. Think of is like a RPG game; except I get to choose the weapons (if there is any) and then I get to stop it. When the battle is over it will say "Battle Mode Deactivated" so you know when it's over. And the only time I will not do battle is if to say like for instead: Killer has a gun pointed in a Team Rocket guy's back, we know who win, if you don't you're a dumbass. Now on with the story!  
  
Who: Ash vs. Sabrina  
Weapons: Pokemon  
Battle Theme Music: The Battle Theme music from FF9  
  
Ash and Sabrina look at each other, and then Ash commands his Haunter but then later finds out that Haunter is gone.  
  
Battle Mode Deactivated  
  
Ash: (looking around) Where the fuck did he go?  
Doll: So do you forfeit?  
Misty: You have no choice but to let pikachu fight.  
Ash: I guess your right. (looks at pikachu) Think you can do it?  
Pikachu: pi pika *I'll try* (hops off ash's shoulder on to the mat and get ready to fight.)  
  
Battle Mode Activated  
  
Who: Same  
Weapons: Same  
Battle Theme Music: Same  
  
Sabrina starts off the battle.  
  
Sabrina: Kadabra! Physic!  
  
Kadabra: Kadabra!  
  
Kadabra picks pikachu off the ground with his mind then smashes him into the ceiling, then into then floor and does it four more times then stops. Pikachu lies there for a second then gets back up on his feet.  
  
Ash: Pikachu! Thunder!  
  
Pikachu: (charging up) PPPPPPIIIIIIKKKKAAACHU!  
  
A big steam of electricity forms around pikachu, then pikachu releases it and a giant lighting bolt hits kadabra. After the lighting bolt cleared, was totally black but is still standing.  
  
Sabrina: Kadabra! Recover!  
  
A white light starts to engulf Kadabra. After the white light is gone, kadabra is totally recovered ready to fight again. Suddenly! Haunter appears behind Sabrina, stretches his face and then laughs. Sabrina just stares at him.  
  
Battle Mode Deactivated  
  
Killer walks up behind Haunter.  
  
Killer: (smacks Haunter in the back of the head with his head.) Where the fuck have you been?  
  
Haunter responses by licking Killer's face, Killer wipes his face with his sleeve.  
  
Killer: You knucklehead! (place his left fist on top of Haunter's head, then takes his right fist, slams it onto his left fist, causing Haunter to slam into the ground. He looks at Sabrina and Kadabra and noticed that they we're both grinning. Brock came up laughing his ass off and stood next to Killer.) (thinking) It just might work. (Killer looks at Brock who is on the floor still laughing.) What are you laughing at chowderhead?   
  
Killer takes two of his fingers and shoves then up his nose, then lifting Brock up by his nose. Sabrina starts to chuckle.  
  
Brock: What was that for? (Killer again takes two fingers tries to poke Brock's eyes; But Brock puts his hand vertical in front of his face.) Ha! Too smart for you! (Killer takes his two index fingers and pokes Brock's eyes.) OW! Nyk Nyk Nyk!  
  
(Scene Change)  
  
Misty: What hell are they doing?  
Ash: They look like The Three Stooges.  
Misty: They look retarded.  
Brock: (from the other side of the gym) Whopwhopwhopwhopwhopwhop!   
(Scene Change)   
  
Killer, Brock and Haunter spot what they're doing.  
  
Killer: (shouting) Kadabra is unable to fight! Ash is the Winner!  
  
Ash and Misty run up to Killer.  
  
Misty: What do you mean? How did Ash win?  
Killer: Look! (points at Kadabra which was on the floor laughing) Kadabra is unable to fight.  
Ash: And Kadabra mind was connected to Sabrina mind.  
Killer: Something like that.  
Doll: That's cheating!  
Killer: Oh just stick it up you're your ass! (grabs a grenade, pulls the pin, and throws it at the doll. The grenade explodes killing the doll.) I hate dolls!  
Sabrina: Thank you!  
Misty: For what?  
Killer: That doll was controlling Sabrina!  
Sabrina: How can I repay you?  
Killer: (points at Ash) He needs a badge.  
Ash: (walks up to Sabrina a receives the Marsh Badge.) Yes! All I need is two more!  
Killer: Let's go! (Ash, Brock, Killer and Misty start to leave)  
Sabrina: Good Luck Killer! I keep haunter here!  
  
Ash picks up his badly beaten pikachu and they all leave.  
  
Location: Outside by the gym  
  
Killer: (Looks at his watch) It's 6:30, I need to get to the Saffron Building before it closes.  
Ash: I need to go to the Pokemon Center.   
Killer: I'll meet you there.  
  
Ash, Brock and Misty walk towards the Pokemon Center while Killer walks to the Saffron Building.  
  
(Scene Change)  
  
Location: By a tree  
  
James: You called sir?  
Figure: yes, (pointing at his Persian) Mr. Bigglesroth (I think that how you spell it) is stuck in the tree. Could you get him down?  
James: (sighs) Yes sir. (starts climbing the tree)  
Figure: (looks at Mr. Bigglesroth) (sweet voice) You complete me, I love you. (normal voice) If anything were to happen to you I don't know what I would do. I'd probably move on, get another cat. But there would be a ten-minute period where I would be inconsolable.  
James: I got him! (Mr. Bigglesroth scratches the hell out of James making him fall to the ground.) Here......you........go.......sir.  
Figure: Thank you James. (Takes the cat from James) (shouting) MEDIC!  
  
Two nurses come out with a rolling bed, they bent over, pick James up and put him on the bed and rushed of with the bed.  
  
(scene change)  
  
Location: Ninja's Room  
  
He's sitting on his looking at a picture of Killer.  
  
Ninja: Soon brother, soon we will meet again, but it will be our last time to meet up again! *Evil laugh*  
  
Will Ninja kill Killer?  
Will Killer get whatever he's looking for?  
Am I stealing bit from Austin Powers 2?  
And where the fuck is Chrissie?  
  
This and much more, or less on:  
  
Pokemon: A New Path  
Act IV: A New Member  
  
I would to thank Shadow for entering the contest in naming the three personal sluts. Want to be a guest, or just send feedback, E-mail me at MCV_Driver@yahoo.com  
  
(c) Arcanine Productions Inc.  



	4. A New Member

  
"A New Path"  
Act IV: A New Member  
By Greg The Arcanine  
  
  
Greg: Disclaimer Time.  
  
You have to be over 18 to read this, if you're under 18 and read this, you will be cursed.  
Chrissie: That's bad.  
Greg: But it comes with a free Frozen Yogurt, which I call Frogurt.  
Chrissie: That's good.  
Greg: The Frogurt is also cursed.  
Chrissie: That's Bad.  
Greg: But it comes with your choice of toppings.  
Chrissie: That's Good  
Greg: The toppings are filled with Potassium Hydroxide.  
Chrissie:(Silence)  
Greg: That's bad.  
Chrissie: Can I go now?  
  
Location: My Office  
  
I was sitting at my desk trying to think of something to write while Chrissie (who was under my desk) was giving me a BJ.  
  
Greg: Damnit!  
Chrissie: (pulls her mouth away from my dick) What?  
Greg: I can't think of anything to write!  
Chrissie: Just put a couple guest-stars in.  
Greg: Good idea! (Pushes the button on the intercom) You guys ready? (Silence) Answer me goddamnit!  
Ash: (on the intercom) Could you give us five minutes?  
Greg: (growls) Fine! If you're not finished in five minutes, I will kick your ass! (looks at Chrissie) Wanna quickie?   
Chrissie: Ok!  
  
(Scene Change)   
  
Meilie: Why do you put up with him?  
Ash: Well, for one thing, he can kick my ass!  
Killer: He also has that remote that sends you in the 12th dimension where everything sucks.  
Ash: I remember that. (Read the second episode if you don't know what they are talking about)  
Rebecca: (still fucking Killer) Tell me *moan* more about that *longer moan* later.  
Brock: (yelling) Just let me put it in!!!  
  
Brock was tied to a post (naked) while Adriana was lying on the ground in front of him fingering herself.  
  
Adriana: (still fingering herself) ooohhhh, this would feel better if I had a nice hard cork in me!  
Greg: (on the intercom) Times up!  
Brock: NNNNNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
Greg: Let's began.  
  
When we last left off in our story, Ash challenged Sabrina the Saffron City's gym leader for his next badge, after winning the battle (with a lot of help from Killer) Ash got his badge, then heads toward the Pokemon Center with Brock and Misty while Killer headed toward the Saffron building. As Chrissie said, there would be some Guest-stars, let's see if you can spot them. Let's watch, shall we?  
  
Location: Saffron Building, Top floor, President's office  
  
President: Hi Killer, How's it going?  
Killer: Not bad. How about you Jake?  
Jake: Can't complain. Take a sit.  
  
They both sit down.  
  
Jake: So what brings you here?  
Killer: I come for the light beacon on your roof.  
Jake: Oh, follow me then.  
  
They both get up and head towards the stairs.  
  
Location: The Roof  
  
Jake: It's right over there. (Points towards the light beacon)  
Killer: Thanks but....  
Jake: but what?  
Killer: What's with the old man? (Pointing toward the old man standing near the light beacon)  
Jake: Don't mind him, just answer his three questions and you'll be fine.  
Killer: O.... kay  
  
Killer walks toward the old man  
  
Old Man: Stop! (Killer stops) Ye must answer these questions three and ye shall see what's on the other side of thee.  
Killer: ok, ask on.  
Old Man: What is your name?  
Killer: Killer!  
Old Man: What is your Quest?  
Killer: To destroy Team Rocket!  
Old Man: What is your favorite color?  
Killer: Blue!  
Old Man: All right, off you go then.  
Killer: Oh, why thank you.  
  
Killer walks towards the beacon, kneels down, and picks up the beacon.  
  
Killer: (Holding the beacon over his head with his hand) (Yelling) Five down! Two to go!!!  
  
Killer starts to walk towards the staircase.  
  
Old Man: Stop! (Killer stops) Ye must answer these questions three and ye shall see what's on the other side of thee.  
Killer: What? Again? (Growls then sighs) Fine, Just ask them!  
Old Man: What is your name?  
Killer: Killer!  
Old Man: What is your Quest?  
Killer: To destroy Team Rocket!  
Old Man: What, is the air velocity of a Swallow?  
Killer: What do you mean? An African Swallow or a European Swallow?  
Old Man: I... uh... I don't know. (And with that, he is cast over the side of the building) AAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!  
  
Jake runs up to Killer.  
  
Jake: What was that about?  
Killer: Who knows, (looks at the beacon in his hand) but I got what I came for.  
  
Killer walk towards the staircase and walks down the stairs.  
  
(Scene Change)  
  
Location: Pokemon Center  
  
Joy: Your pokemon will be ready in an hour.  
Ash: Thanks! (Looks at Brock and Misty) Let's get something to eat while we're waiting  
Brock: That's going to be a problem.  
Misty: Why?  
Brock: We have enough money to eat tonight, that's it.  
Ash: (freaking out) FUCK! (cools down) Well, while we're eating, we'll figure a way out the raise money.  
Brock: Ok, let's go then.  
  
They all leave.  
  
Location: In front of Saffron Building  
  
Killer walks out the front door. He starts to walk towards the pokemon center when felts something on his left shoulder.  
  
Killer: I really wish you would stop doing that!  
Floating Figure: Did you get the emerald?  
Killer: Yes I did. (Shows the emerald to the Floating Figure) Do you know where the next one is?  
Floating Figure: The next one is in Fuchsia City.  
Killer: Where in Fuchsia City?  
Floating Figure: I'll tell you when you get there, and Ash, Brock and Misty are at a restaurant next the Saffron City Bank discussing what to do about money.  
Killer: I'll figure out something.  
Floating Figure: Right, and someone by the name of Katie will ask if she can join you, you say yes. I'll see you in Fuchsia City, Good Luck.  
  
(Floating Figure disappears.)  
  
Killer: Katie? Oh well. Better get moving.  
  
Killer starts walking towards the bank, after 10 minutes, he finally reached the bank. He sees the restaurant and starts to head towards it, and then notice two guys in uniforms with an "R" symbol on it. They walk right past him and went straight into the bank.  
  
Killer: (grins) The money problem has been solved.  
  
Killer draws his gun and slowly walks into the bank.  
  
(Scene Change)  
  
Location: Inside a restaurant   
  
Ash, Brock and Misty are sitting at a table eating and discussing their money problem while some stupid ass country song was playing from the restaurant's speakers.  
  
Ash: The music is so damn annoying!!  
Misty: (angry voice) Never mind that goddamn song, try to focus at that problem at hand that you got us into!!  
Ash: It's not my fault we're broke!  
Misty: No, but if we would have stuck to the map, we would already would have food!!!  
Brock: (pissed) TURN OFF THIS SHITTY ASS MUSIC!!!!!  
  
Everyone in the restaurant stares at Brock, while "Mope" by The Bloodhound Gang replaces the song that was playing earlier.  
  
Guy #1: We gonna drop this next bomb for a money makin' playa that ain't with us no mo  
Guy #2: Yeah, Notorious B.I.G.  
Guy #1: Hell no, we gonna do this for a gangbanging thug that never seen it comin'  
Guy #2: Yeah, Tupac Shakur  
Guy #1: Nah bitch, I'm talking' `bout motherfuckin' Falco and shit!  
Guy #2: What? Falco?  
  
(Music Starts)  
  
Ash: I love this song  
Voice: It's O.K.  
Brock: Killer? What are you doing here?  
Killer: Never mind that, but I figured out your money problems.  
Ash: How?  
Killer: (he reaches his arm out and drops a bag with a $ sign on it) With this  
Misty: How did you get this?  
Killer: I saved a friends life, so he repaid with this.  
Ash: Sweet, now we can buy food!  
Misty: And stay at a Hotel.  
Killer: I live in this city, you guys can stay at my place; I have a couch that unfolds into a bed.  
Brock: That would be cheaper.  
Killer: While you guys shop for food for our trip, I'll go clean up my house.  
Misty: Waitress!  
  
A young waitress (about Brock's age) with blonde hair and green eyes walks up to the table. And of course, Brock's mouth drops to the floor.   
  
Waitress: Yes? Can I help yo... (Looks at Killer) Aren't you Killer?  
Killer: Yes. Why?  
Waitress: My name is Katie. Do you think I could join you in your quest?  
Killer: (thinking) Damn, news travels fast. (Speaking) Are you a good fighter?  
Katie: Only when I have to be.  
Man: (he walks up to Katie and swiftly grabs her ass) Hey Baby! Want to go back to my place and fuck?  
  
Battle Mode Activated  
  
Who: Katie vs. Guy  
Weapons: None  
Battle Theme Music: The battle theme from LoM  
  
Katie grabs the guy's wrist and throws him over her shoulder. The guy flies to the other side of the restaurant into a wall. The guy gets up and charges her. She stands there watching the guy run towards her, in one quick movement, as the guy tries to tackle her, but she steps out of the way and the guy falls on his face. The guy gets back up, turns around only to see Katie side kick him in the nose. The guy holds his nose and runs away.  
  
Battle Mode Deactivated  
  
Killer stands up clapping.  
  
Killer: Bravo, welcome to the team  
  
The manger walks up  
  
Manger: (pissed) Damnit Katie, that's the third time this week!! YOU'RE FIRED!!!!  
Katie: Fuck you, I'm out of here!  
  
Katie walks out  
  
Killer: Let's go, we have an early start tomorrow.  
Ash: But it's only 8:13 (pointing at his watch)  
Misty: But we need to get food.  
  
(The music stops)  
  
Pac-Man: Yo yo yo yo yo! What it is motherfuckers?  
Guy #1: Aw shit, here comes Pac-Man.  
Guy #2: Hey Pac-Man, what's up?  
Pac-Man: Me you bitches! I'm high on crack! Wanna freebase!  
Guy #2: No Pac-man, drugs are bad!  
Guy #1: Nope, can't help you man.  
Pac-Man: Pussies. (You can hear him smoking crack in the background) Whoa! Holy Shit!  
  
(Music starts again)  
  
Ash: This song kicks ass!  
Killer: I'll be going.  
Brock: Wait! How do you get to your house?  
Killer: It's by the Pokemon Pet Store.  
Brock: Where is that?  
Killer: Right by the Pokemon Center.  
Ash: Ok, see you there.  
  
They all leave  
  
(Scene Change)  
  
Location: In a office  
  
Ninja: You call me in sir?  
Figure in Chair: Yes, I have another mission to go with the last one.  
Ninja: What is it?  
Figure in Chair: I have just found out Killer is collecting some kind of emeralds.  
Ninja: How many?  
Figure in Chair: I don't know, but I heard they contain some kind of power.  
Ninja: What kind of power.  
Figure in Chair: That's what I'd like to know; I want you to get your hands on one.  
Ninja: What do they look like?  
Figure in Chair: Ask the President of the Saffron Building, he should know.  
Ninja: Right, is that it?  
Figure in Chair: That will be all Ninja.   
  
(Scene Change)  
  
Location: Inside Killer's house  
  
Killer is trying to find a place to hide his porno magazines when there is a knock on the door. Killer just throws the magazines in a closet and answers the door.   
  
It's Katie.  
  
Killer: I take it you followed me home.  
Katie: Actually, some girl from the pet store told me you live here.  
Killer: Oh, anyways, what do you need?  
Katie: Could I come in?  
Killer: I guess.  
  
Katie walks in and Killer closes the close behind her.  
  
Katie: Nice place.  
Killer: Thanks, and before you me in my quest, you need a few things.  
Katie: Like what?  
Killer: Follow me.  
  
Katie follows Killer until they reach the garage; Killer flicks on the light and walks in front of a bunch of tools hanging in from a wall. He opens a toolbox on the desk and presses an open. The wall with the tools on it being to open (like a double door) slowly, it started to revile several types of guns, clips and bullets, a bunch of grenades in a crate box, different types and sizes of knifes, some swords, and a bunch of stacked papers on a desk entitle: Shit List.  
  
Katie: Oh shit! Where the hell did you get all this?  
Killer: I would tell you, but then I would have to kill you. I'm the NRA man of the year though.  
Katie: (still looking at all the guns) I bet.  
Killer: Anyways, here is what you need for the trip. (Killer walks up to guns) You will need, (starts grabbing stuff off the wall) a 9mm, three clips, a gun holder, a combat knife, a knife holder, two grenades, and a grenade holder, it holds up to 6 grenades. (Hands her all the stuff) Rendezvous here at o eight hundred.  
Katie: Thanks! (Thinking) Damn! This guy is insane!  
Killer: I'm not insane, Team Rocket will be trying to kill us.  
Katie: How did you read my mind?  
Killer: Never mind that, just meet me back here in the morning.  
  
Katie leaves  
  
Killer: What is it this time?  
  
(Floating Figure appears)  
  
Floating Figure: Damn, someone needs to pull that stick out of your ass.  
Killer: Whatever, so what do need?  
Floating Figure: I just need to make sure that we still have a deal.  
Killer: Yes we still have a deal. Right after I finish my quest, I'll help you with yours.  
Floating Figure: Good, see you in Fuchsia.  
  
(Floating Figure disappears)  
  
Killer: What a tight ass!!  
  
(Later)  
  
There is a knock on the door and Killer answers it.  
  
It's Ash, Brock and Misty.  
  
Killer: You guys took forever.  
Ash: I had to go by the pokemon center.  
  
They all walk in  
  
Killer: (looking at his watch) It's 12:17, I'm hitting the sack. (Walks to his room)  
Brock: I guess I'll take the floor. (Starts taking out his sleeping bag)  
Misty: Where's the couch/bed?  
Killer: (yelling from his room) It's in the room next to me!!  
Misty: (yells back at Killer) Thanks you!!! (Looks at ash) (Whispering) Care to join me lover?  
  
Misty runs her finger across ash's chest then walk off into the other room swaging her hips.  
  
Ash: I'm there!! (Ash walks in the room that misty just went in and closes the door)  
  
(Next Day)  
  
Everyone is packed and ready to go, Killer is in the garage getting some ammo and grenades. Then he goes over to a box and opens it reviling five emeralds (like the one he collected earlier), and then he walks over to a door and opens it and a bunch of magazines fall on him.  
  
Killer: I wondered what happened to my entire playboy's.  
  
He pulls himself out of the pile of magazines, gets up, and reaches into the closet and pulls out a backpack. Then he throws the magazines back into the closet and closes the door. He walks back the box with the emeralds and puts them in the backpack along with the ammo and grenades. He zips up the bag and walks into the den.  
  
Killer: Everyone ready?  
All: Yes!!  
Killer: (looks at Katie) Got all of your stuff?  
Katie: Yes  
Killer: Good! Then were ready!  
Brock: (looking at the map) It's going to take us days to get to Fuchsia City!  
Ash: We could take a shortcut.  
Misty: (Runs up to him and starts strangling him)(yelling) WE ARE NOT TAKING ONE OF YOUR GODDAMN SHORTCUTS!!!!!!!  
Killer: Actually, I know a good shortcut to Fuchsia City.   
Ash: (Misty stops choking him and he falls into Misty's chest) (muffled voice) Hello mommy!  
Misty: Ash!  
Ash: I would like seconds now mommy!  
Misty: ASH!!  
Ash: (gets up from Misty's chest) Sorry luv, I got stuck in your dirty pillows.  
Brock: Anyways! Won't we be trending water?  
Killer: Yes, but there is a bridge we can cross.  
Katie: Let's go already!  
  
They all pick up their gear and head out the door  
  
(Scene Change)  
  
Location: Pokemon Pet store  
  
We see a figure dressed in all black (Not Ninja or Killer) come out of the store with two Vulpixs under each arm. As he walks off, a foot appears from the side of the building tripping the guy. When the guy tripped, a half human, half pokemon Meowth wearing a trench coat, picked up the Vulpixs. The guy in black (remember that name?) stands up and draws his sword.  
  
Guy in Black: Damnit Phil! This will be the last time you will steal my Vulpixs!  
Phil: Not if you can catch me first Shadow! HAHAHAHAHAHA!  
  
Shadow chases Phil while swinging the sword around slightly injuring some people. Killer and the gang stood there wide-eyed.  
  
Killer: Is there not a day that goes by that something normal happens?  
Katie: (smiling) There will never be.  
  
Will Killer succeed in his Quest?  
Will Katie be any help?  
Will Ninja stop Killer in his tracks?  
Will I ever shut the hell up and stop asking so many questions?  
  
And much less on:  
  
Pokemon: A New Path  
Act V: A New Story  
Want to be a guest, or just send feedback, E-mail me at MCV_Driver@yahoo.com  
  
(c) Arcanine Productions Inc.  



End file.
